The Itch
March 22nd, 2011*Scratch, scratch*
I am used to be THE queen of everything “infomercial”. I absolutely loved them. And because I absolutely loved them, I’ve got a laundry room-turned-storage room that would make Mr. SlapChop jealous. If you were to open ONE of my laundry room cabinets, you’d see the Magic Bullet Deluxe, Miracle Blades, multiple copies of everything and anything Billy Blanks, Proactive (even though I don’t have an acne problem), Pasta Express - Double Set, Japanese antioxidant extracting socks (or something like that. They are still in the box.), and even the Water-LESS Pet Bath Towels (although I don’t own a pet, I thought maybe, just maybe, I could use it to wash my car. “Thought” is the key word there).
See, before I had kids I would actually sit up all night and watch them on TV. I’d nap during the day so that I could watch them at night. I’d wake up early on weekend mornings so I could get first glimpse of the newest blender, face cream, and workout regimen. But that was over three years ago. Not once in the over three years have I even thought twice about waking early to watch an infomercial.
Until now…*Scratch, scratch*
Just recently I had a booth at the Home/Garden Show. Needing a break from standing in a 10×10 booth for three days, I decided to walk around the Show to smell the flowers and relax to the sounds of the river-scapes that were so beautifully displayed. As I rounded the corner of Isle 7, I ran smack dab into a big red stage with a microphone-and Japanese bandanna-wearing man. Lllaaaauu! Suddenly, the angels were singing, the clouds cleared, and the sun was shining directly on this indoor booth! Amazingly, a greater force stopped me directly in front of his stage just as his LIVE infomercial was beginning. Entranced, I stood there to listed to his presentation…and even laughed hysterically at his bad jokes. Before I knew it, I was literally (no joke!) throwing my credit card at him, discreetly elbowing the 5 people around me, and shaking my leg vigorously. I HAD to have his SushiMaker. And I was actually nervous that if I didn’t get my credit card to him fast enough, I would lose out on his “special” which included a FREE knife, cookbook, seaweed stuff, and DVD!!
With a spring in my step, a smile on my face, and my purchase in-hand, I walked back to my 10×10. I was so excited to be the proud owner of the SushiMaker. For the last 4 hours of the Show, I dreamed of the endless new and healthy dinners I could make with my new kitchen gadget. I felt so happy. Just the way I felt over three years back, when I bought 3 Minute Legs and AbTronic.
So…I am sitting in my studio now, staring at my yet-to-be-used purchase. And I can’t help but wonder…would/could having a THIRD baby curb my addiction by putting out the flame that has just been ignited?
*Scratch, scratch*
-Victoria







